I was...

I was just surfing around friendster's new outlook on its system the other day when I looked thru my past messages to people in my sent box. That's when I saw one of the messages that was sent out late last year to some fella.

I re-read thru its contents and it kinda shocked me.

I can't believe that I thought and behaved that way not too long ago. Part of me was actually somewhat disgusted at it, the other part of me wanted to laugh. Yeah, it was real silly looking back at it.

I guess all of us at different point of time behave and think differently at certain situations. At that time when I wrote that message, I didn't think that it was silly and childish, its only when the thing has blown over, that you find it so.

I don't know about others, I do have the habit of looking back at the things I did, thought about in the past. Each time I do that, it seriously never fails to amaze me at the things that I say or did last time. Sometimes, it makes me laugh, other times it makes me feel embarassed.

I kinda like the different feelings I get each time I "re-visit' my past (yeah, so to speak). Its like each time, you'll get a "revelation" and you'll really learn from it. I guess that's what people mean when they say we learn from past mistakes.

Which kinda has a certain impact on how I behave now. I mean, I dunno, but it has kinda made me more self-conscious, its like its likely you would find yourself very silly later, so you become extra careful now, yea, I know I know, its silly.

Anyways.

I used to keep a diary when I was younger, but halfway thru kinda got too lazy to continue with it. I guess the other part of the reason is that my parents keep peeping thru my things so much that it became a problem to have to keep accounting for everything I wrote in there. -_-

If not for that, I think its quite a good habit to keep a diary or write a blog!! hahaha!!

But I digress. Anyways.

Have you ever looked back on the things that you may have said or did last time and wished you didn't?

It's so nostalgic...