2010 is finally over. I'm glad to move on to a new year and hopefully, this year would be a much better and productive year for me. For the most part of 2010, it felt like it was on a fast forward mode for me.
Things were happening real quick especially with work being so hectic, changes in management, which inevitably mean changes in the way we do things. New management means new rules, new temperament, new expectations, new everything.
I did not enjoy 2010 actually. Though I must say, that 2010 did indeed see me travelling about mostly the ASEAN region quite abit for work. It was indeed an eye opener to experience the vast difference in culture and the way our Asian neighbors do business in general.
2010 was also a struggle for me too. It was a season or rather, trend of last minute events coming my way. The stress and pressure cooker environment that I had to work in for the large part, all by myself was daunting and traumatic.
I was glad tho that after much persuasion, my boss did finally agree to let another colleague work on events with me, but that opened yet another chapter of problems.
With the additional headcount, boss was expecting technically for us to cover the jobs of 2 persons each. But as I was doing the jobs of as many as 9 - 10 persons myself, he is in fact expecting us to cover the workload of 18 - 20 persons.
And you know, with a person new on the job, that realistically isn't going to happen.
Of course my new partner is a smart girl who has initiative and learns pretty fast too, but it doesn't help at all in managing expectations from the boss and the fact that all of a sudden, people become so critical with regards to how resources are being used, and profitability.
I kinda feel that it was my fault actually. I have spoiled the market in the beginning, and everything just snowballed from there.
My world came crashing down on me during one of the events I was working on. A major screw up led to a series of ugly situations, and one problem after another. Can't really blame anyone actually. Millions of oversights on my part due to dips in my productivity level of course.
Sigh. How I wished I had raised the alarm early in the beginning. My friend is right, I ought to learn how to manage myself better.
Sigh. What's done cannot be undone. To be honest, I can't get over it, and have been deeply affected by it till now. The feeling of letting people down feels totally disgusting that it makes me nauseous. Truth is, I am finding it difficult to face my client, who happens also to be my friend.
Anyhow, I am glad to have 2010 over and done with. A church mate I met after watch night covenant renewal service said to me: may this new year be a year of personal bests. Indeed, I long to start anew, a brand new beginning, a year of personal bests not just in terms of running.
I want to start 2011 right in the right place, with the right frame of mind as well. Decisions have been made and I pray for grace to keep to my promises.
Have a blessed new year everyone!
*P/S: EL, if you are reading this, I'm terribly sorry, I know probably that no words can make up for all that has happened.
1 beats:
hey gal, i felt equally bad as you do and i'm sure it's the string of events that caused you to be so distracted.
well, that's the past and we managed to save the night, didn't we? :)
take a good break before you start striving in your new work. all the best ya!! btw, where is my naraya ah?
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